Hidden in Plain Sight: The Disturbing Truth About Pseudo-Helplessness Among Us

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Introduction

Here’s the truth about pseudo-helplessness: It can affect anyone! You’ll often find it discussed with regard to elderly people, especially ageing parents. However, pseudo-helplessness, is a phenomenon that you have probably encountered more often than you realise.

It’s a psychological condition where individuals perceive themselves as being unable to influence or control their circumstances, even when they do have the power to change the situation. This sense of powerlessness can seep into various aspects of life, affecting everything from your work performance to your personal relationships. Understanding how common pseudo-helplessness is, and recognising it in yourself and others, is the first step towards overcoming it.

How Pseudo-Helplessness Differs from Learned Helplessness

While pseudo-helplessness shares similarities with learned helplessness, the two are distinct concepts. Learned helplessness occurs when an individual experiences repeated negative outcomes despite their efforts to change the situation.

Over time, they learn to expect failure, leading to a sense of helplessness that persists even when circumstances improve. Pseudo-helplessness, on the other hand, is more about the perception of helplessness rather than an accurate assessment of one’s abilities or circumstances. It is often self-imposed or influenced by external factors, such as societal expectations or past experiences, but it does not necessarily stem from a history of repeated failures.

In essence, learned helplessness is a conditioned response to repeated negative experiences, whereas pseudo-helplessness is a belief system that convinces individuals they are powerless, even in situations where they have control.

Pseudo-Helplessness is Not the Preserve of the Elderly

So, to repeat the point, the truth about pseudo-helplessness is that it is not a phenomenon restricted to ageing parents. While older adults may exhibit signs of pseudo-helplessness due to physical limitations or social isolation, this condition can affect individuals of all ages.

For instance, teenagers might feel powerless to influence their social standing at school, or young professionals might believe they cannot advance in their careers due to perceived limitations.

The idea that pseudo-helplessness is exclusive to the elderly overlooks how pervasive and varied this phenomenon can be across different demographics. It can appear in any situation where someone feels trapped, unable to make changes or assert control, regardless of age.

Pseudo-Helplessness in Film and Literature

Pseudo-helplessness has been a recurring theme in film and literature, often serving as a central element in character development and plot dynamics. Here are a few examples:

  1. “Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” (1962): This psychological thriller showcases pseudo-helplessness in the character of Blanche Hudson, who is physically incapacitated and increasingly dependent on her sister, Jane. Despite her circumstances, Blanche’s helplessness is exacerbated by Jane’s manipulation, leading to a disturbing power dynamic.
  2. “The Talented Mr. Ripley” (1999): In this film, Tom Ripley embodies pseudo-helplessness in a different way. Although he is capable and intelligent, Ripley convinces himself that the only way to achieve success is through deceit and manipulation, rather than embracing his abilities and pursuing legitimate paths.
  3. “Great Expectations” by Charles Dickens: Miss Havisham is a quintessential example of pseudo-helplessness in literature. She chooses to remain in a state of emotional paralysis after being jilted at the altar, freezing her life in time and refusing to move on, despite having the ability to rebuild her life.
  4. “Gone with the Wind” by Margaret Mitchell: Scarlett O’Hara, although often seen as a strong character, also exhibits pseudo-helplessness at times, particularly in her relationship with Ashley Wilkes. She clings to a romantic ideal that no longer exists, unable to acknowledge the reality of her situation.
  5. “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” by Ken Kesey: The character of Chief Bromden displays pseudo-helplessness, pretending to be deaf and mute to avoid confrontation and interaction. His perceived helplessness is a form of self-protection, allowing him to navigate the oppressive environment of the mental institution without drawing attention to himself.

Pseudo-Helplessness and the Sick Role

The concept of the “sick role,” introduced by sociologist Talcott Parsons, refers to the social expectations placed on individuals who are ill. In this role, a person is often excused from normal responsibilities and is expected to seek help and cooperate with medical professionals. However, pseudo-helplessness can manifest when an individual adopts the sick role as a means of avoiding responsibilities or exerting control over others.

For example, someone might exaggerate or prolong their illness to gain sympathy, attention, or to escape from obligations. While the sick role can provide temporary relief, it can also reinforce feelings of helplessness and dependency, ultimately making it harder for the individual to regain their autonomy.

Pseudo-Helplessness and Erich Fromm: The Appeal of Dependency

Erich Fromm, a renowned psychoanalyst and social philosopher, explored the concept of dependency in his works. Fromm argued that many people are drawn to dependency because it provides a sense of security and relieves them of the burden of making decisions or taking responsibility for their lives. Pseudo-helplessness aligns with this idea, as individuals may subconsciously prefer to remain in a state of helplessness because it allows them to avoid the challenges and uncertainties of independence.

This dependency can be comforting, but it is ultimately limiting. Fromm emphasised the importance of achieving a balance between independence and connection with others, advocating for a form of freedom that does not lead to isolation but instead encourages healthy, interdependent relationships.

Pseudo-Helplessness and Bad Faith in Jean-Paul Sartre

Jean-Paul Sartre, a prominent existentialist philosopher, introduced the concept of “bad faith” to describe the act of deceiving oneself to avoid the responsibility of freedom. In Sartre’s view, individuals often deny their own freedom by convincing themselves they are helpless or bound by circumstances beyond their control. This act of self-deception is a form of bad faith, where a person chooses to live inauthentically rather than confront the reality of their freedom and the accompanying responsibility.

Pseudo-helplessness can be seen as a manifestation of bad faith. When you convince yourself that you cannot change your situation, you are avoiding the existential burden of making choices and taking control of your life. Sartre would argue that overcoming pseudo-helplessness requires embracing your freedom and the anxiety that comes with it, to live a life that is true to your authentic self.

Conclusion

Pseudo-helplessness is a widespread and multifaceted phenomenon that affects individuals across all walks of life. It is not limited by age, social status, or circumstance, and it can be observed in various forms in film, literature, and psychological theory. Whether it’s a character in a novel who remains trapped in their past, a person adopting the sick role to avoid responsibility, or the existential struggle against bad faith, pseudo-helplessness is a condition that can limit personal growth and fulfilment.

Understanding pseudo-helplessness, recognising it in yourself or others, and exploring the philosophical and psychological underpinnings of this mindset are crucial steps toward overcoming it. By doing so, you can reclaim your sense of agency and take control of your life, breaking free from the self-imposed limitations that pseudo-helplessness creates.

Do you recognise this? Leave a comment.